I Can't Take the Way He Sings, but I Love to Hear Him Talk

If there is anyone, or anything, that I dislike more than the New York Yankees, it is probably Scott Boras. For those of you that do not immediately recognize the name, Mr. Boras is the high-profile sports agent whose clientele includes a certain third baseman that has spent time in Seattle, Texas, and the Bronx.

Another interesting Boras-related fact is that he earned a degree at the University of the Pacific McGeorge School of Law. Simply as a matter of principle, I do not trust anyone or anything that came from the same university that produced the basketball spectacle that is "The Kandi Man", Michael Olowokandi.

Well, I say that A-Rod is a Boras client, but you would not be able to discern that fact if you were a fly on the wall at the recent meetings between Rodriguez and the progeny of George Steinbrenner. It appears that Boras is finally realizing what everyone else secretly suspected when his client opted out of his mammoth deal during Game 4 of this year's World Series: You can make demands, you can push the envelope, but if you go out too far on the limb, sometimes you find yourself imitating Wile E. Coyote in clawing for solid ground when there is none to be found.

According to the aforementioned article, A-Rod and his wife have been meeting with the Yankee brass without the presence of Boras. Due to the fact that I have not graduated from law school yet, I'm not an expert on these matters, but if I were a defense attorney, I would probably deem myself a failure if I allowed my client to meet alone with Assistant District Attorney Abbie Carmichael. That's probably because I would be motivated by more than the Rules of Professional Responsibility, but I digress.

Speaking of Law & Order, didn't the guy on the left (Jerry Orbach) really miss out on the star power from his time in the quasi-legal spotlight? Angie Harmon goes on to marry the late, great New York Giants cornerback Jason Sehorn, Sam Waterston (Jack McCoy) encourages you nightly to invest with TD Ameritrade, but where is Orbach to be found?

Can someone find the guy a slot in a late-night infomercial for goodness sake? If that's too much, what about a promo commercial for a retirement facility in Arizona or Florida? Come on kids, do it for Jerry.