You're All Tied Up As You Should Be
Congratulations to Ms. Stacy Villescas for correctly naming "Lovely Rita" by The Beatles as the Tuesday Song of the Day.
I'm guessing the song wasn't written about Rita Wilson, but that's mainly because I don't see Tom Hanks' name alongside McCartney and Lennon in my liner notes to "Sgt. Pepper's."
With yesterday's news that Adam "Pacman" Jones will be heading to the Great White North to play in the CFL for the Winnipeg Blue Bombers, I'm slightly disappointed that the lady friend and I will be residing in Houston after the marriage.
"Why is that?" you might ask.
Well, according to well-placed sources (coughColeGriffithcough), Pacman's old house outside of Nashville is still for sale, and I've always wanted the opportunity to purchase a piece of real estate that was once in the running for the title of "Modern Day Location of Sodom and Gomorrah".
Here's the alternative, though. While Pacman is playing in the land of Canadian Bacon, Labatt Blue, and the word "EH", he's surely going to want to maintain a presence in the mind of NFL GMs.
What better way to do that then his own reality show? You're telling me that you wouldn't want to watch a special season of "This Old House" hosted by Bob Vila, Norm Abram, and special guest host Pacman Jones?
Pacman could stoke a rivalry with Ty Pennington (MOVE...THAT...IMPALA!!!), he could come out with a line of power tools at Sears (WATCH OUT, VILA), and he could increase his street cred with the obviously edgy audience of PBS viewers.
It's fail-proof, my friends.
With yesterday's news that Adam "Pacman" Jones will be heading to the Great White North to play in the CFL for the Winnipeg Blue Bombers, I'm slightly disappointed that the lady friend and I will be residing in Houston after the marriage.
"Why is that?" you might ask.
Well, according to well-placed sources (coughColeGriffithcough), Pacman's old house outside of Nashville is still for sale, and I've always wanted the opportunity to purchase a piece of real estate that was once in the running for the title of "Modern Day Location of Sodom and Gomorrah".
Here's the alternative, though. While Pacman is playing in the land of Canadian Bacon, Labatt Blue, and the word "EH", he's surely going to want to maintain a presence in the mind of NFL GMs.What better way to do that then his own reality show? You're telling me that you wouldn't want to watch a special season of "This Old House" hosted by Bob Vila, Norm Abram, and special guest host Pacman Jones?
Pacman could stoke a rivalry with Ty Pennington (MOVE...THAT...IMPALA!!!), he could come out with a line of power tools at Sears (WATCH OUT, VILA), and he could increase his street cred with the obviously edgy audience of PBS viewers.It's fail-proof, my friends.
Update (Thurs. morning): Apparently, the Pacman to Winnipeg transaction will not take place after all. I always knew that Canadians would never accept an American arcade hero.
Labels: Bob Vila, Canadian Football League, Nashville, Norm Abram, Pacman Jones, Rita Wilson, Tennessee, The Beatles, This Old House, Tom Hanks, Winnipeg Blue Bombers
posted by Justin @ 9/02/2009 08:04:00 PM
7 comments
7 Comments:
Serious professional responsibility question: While walking to my car in downtown Baltimore last night after work, I passed a young man wearing matching navy-blue-and-white shirt and baseball cap, each with an overlapping N and Y. I saw in his hand tickets for the Orioles-Yankees game. Would I be subject to discipline if I spat on him?
Hypothetically, of course.
Jeremy,
I'm going to go ahead and say you would be subject to discipline if you FAILED to spit on said young man wearing clothing such as you have described.
Additional Update...his house sold last week. You missed out on your chance!!
Jonathan Crompton
This post has now risen to the top of the list for "Running Down a Dream" posts with outdated information. I quit.
You would fit right in here. Oriole fandom is defined by hatred of the Yankees. They seem stuck in the half glorious days of the 1970s and early 1980s, when they consistently won 100+ games and finished second in the east to the Yankees.
Yankee hatred is as thick as the molasses air wafting in off Baltimore Harbor.
"Half-glorious days of the 1970s and early 1980s"?
The O's won 3 World Series in a 17-year span from 1966 to 1983 ('66, '70, and '83), won the A.L. Pennant 6 times in that same time period, and brought home the A.L. East title 7 times in the same time frame.
As a Rangers fan, those sound like the "full-glorious days".
You right. This is a perfect example of why you should always look up the facts instead of relying on the bitter memory of those who play the Yankees 18 times a year.
I will be at Camden Yards this weekend, wearing a blue hat, and explaining the real meaning of baseball suffering.
Post a Comment
<< Home