The World Is In Your Hands or It's At Your Throat

Ladies and gentlemen, I take it as my duty to present to you the great and mighty foe of Baylor Bear football.

Am I talking about the entire Big XII? Possibly.

Am I speaking of those football programs that actually remember football relies on a different scoring standard than golf? Again, possibly.

At this moment, though, I am speaking of the (presumptive) Democratic nominee for the President of these United States in the Year of Our Lord 2008, Mr. Barack Obama.

Now, my faithful readers, I can hear your cries of derision. They rise up to me in a raucous chorus of disbelief, but the facts being what they are, the reality of the impending fallout simply cannot be ignored. As documented on that reputable journalistic outlet known as Deadspin.com, Mr. Obama's fabled acceptance speech at (Insert Corporate Name Here) at Mile High will take place on the same evening as Baylor's opening game of the 2008 football season, an August 28th matchup with the Demon Deacons of Wake Forest.

Are you kidding me, Mr. Obama? Did you hear that nickname Wake Forest is packing? DEMON DEACONS? Sure, we're the Bears and all, but DEMON DEACONS? That, my friends, is what nightmares are made of, pure and simple.

For the foregoing reasons, the editorial board of Running Down a Dream hereby requests that Mr. Obama and the entirety of the Democratic National Committee choose to move Mr. Obama's acceptance to the following night, August 29th, so that the Baylor Bears might have a full measure of support in their opening battle of the 2008 Slaughter Fest, scratch that, season against the fearsome spectre of the Wake Forest Demon Deacons. Failing that, the editorial board requests that Mr. Obama integrate into his acceptance speech various denigrating remarks directed at the Winston-Salem, North Carolina metropolitan area.

Respectfully Submitted,

The Running Down a Dream Editorial Board